Monday, March 5, 2012

Campaign Challenge #2

This 2nd challenge in Rach's campaign is tough, and I am determined to give it my best. I have decided to do numbers 1 and 2. I have used all of the prompts.
I will leave the theme for you to figure out.
Using a different genre than my own: Post Apocalyptic
I am something of a masochist, so bring on the critiques.
Here goes...

Do one or more of the following:
  1. Write a pitch/logline for a book based on the prompts (less than 100 words)
  2. Write a short story/flash fiction piece of less than 200 words based on the prompts
  3. Write a poem with a twist using the prompts as inspiration (in less than 200 words)
  4. Write a story/poem in five sentences, each sentence based on one of the prompts
  5. Write a poem/flash fiction piece (in less than 200 words) about the water pear *without* using the words “pear”, “spoon”, or “droplet”.
For added difficulty/challenge:
  • Complete at least three of the above activities and tie them all together with a common theme (feel free to either state the theme in your post or leave us to guess what it might be)
  • Write in a genre that is not your own
  • Ask Challenge entrants to critique your writing. After the Challenge closes, you may wish to re-post your revised piece(s), and I’ll include a Linky List at the bottom of this post for those wishing more feedback on their revisions (note: revised entries will not be judged, so please label clearly your original post and your revisions. Please do not offer critique unless someone asks for it, as per the usual blogging conventions. If you do ask for critique, make sure you ask for it clearly so people know you want it, and please be prepared to receive feedback that may not be 100% glowing. If you are a critiquer, please be tactful and courteous, and remember to provide positives as well as negatives.)

Prompt 1: Two people are sitting together under the remains of a concrete bridge. Their backs are against a rusted bridge support. One person’s leg is cut. The other person has wet hair.
Prompt 2-5: The pictures I included below.


Reign of the Survivalists'

#1(100 words)- Fifty years after a mile wide asteroid hit the US, the atmosphere is still saturated with debris. The sun never shines. The Eastern half of the North American continent is unlivable. While the rest of the world wars over control of food and unpolluted drinking water, a new power controls all of North American. The Survivalists' used the desperation to gain power, instate a totalitarian government, and enslave the remaining population. They have now turned their eye toward the rest of the world. Dreaming of a place where children are once again allowed to play, Sonya plans to stop them.

#2 (199 words)- Sonya combed her fingers through her salty, wet hair then leaned her head back against the rusted support of the crumbling concrete bridge. Thirsty, she licked her dry, cracked lips with an equally dry tongue.  Dreia sat beside her rubbing at a new cut on her emaciated thigh, weariness creating lines in her fifteen year old face after a day spent sifting through the debris on the beach for anything of value like combs, shoes, or clothing. 
Seeing that wariness on her friend’s young face sparked resentment inside Sonya. Her grandmother whispered stories of a time when children had been allowed to play, kicking balls across the very bridge this rusted backrest used to support.
 A time when fruit was so ripe and plump it could quench one’s thirst as well as water.
Staring at the shapes in the flames of the fire at her feet, Sonya longed for the return of the world her grandmother told her about.
 She rubbed the scars on her arms from the slavemaster’s whip, glanced again at the wariness on her friend’s face, and vowed that one day she would find a way to free her people from the Survivorists’ rule. Or die trying.


69 comments:

Siv Maria said...

Wow, you really captured a world that I hope never to see. Very good use of the prompts and a well written piece.

meradeth said...

Great world-building here! Sounds like something I'd love to read more of!

T.D. McFrost said...

WOW! Very complex logline considering you only got the prompt this morning. Your mind is so intricate--I love it!

Melissa said...

Nice entry! I enjoyed reading this very much.
Melissa Maygrove - entry #14

Rachel Morgan said...

Wow, people are doing SO well at combining all the prompts into a single piece of fiction. Go you!

xx Rachel
My entry

Tara Tyler said...

great disaster survival story!

David P. King said...

If Post Apocalyptic is not your thing, I can't even tell. Loved the character's attitude at the end. Nice one! :)

Kevin Hiatt said...

Geez.. really, really good. I was lost at combining all the prompts, and you pull it off so flawlessly.

Jennifer Fischetto said...

This is awesome. I love the part about the fruit and water, so seamless. Great job! :)

YelenaC said...

This is great. You told so much in so little words, and used all of the prompts! Nice job! I would love to read the rest of the story :)

My entry is #23.

Morgan said...

You're so awesome, Sabrina. Really great job--way to fit it all in! "Like" ;)

Nancy Thompson said...

That was very, very good! Exceptional sensory details. I especially liked your pitch. Well done! I'm entry #5.

Ashley Nixon said...

This was so great! And to do two challenges!? Really amazing!

Lady Gwen said...

Truly distopian. Very well done. I felt like a slave, just like those girls.

Gwen said...

Oh, that's a world that really needs Sonya to help it.

laurenwaters.net said...

First of all, your blog is gorgeous. Second, I love what you did with the challenge. I especially liked how you described the water pear. Very well done :)

C.M.Brown said...

Heavily political story, full of intrigue!

C.M.Brown said...

The world Dreia and Sonya live in seems very sad! I hope she is able to free her people in the future! Nicely done!

Nick Wilford said...

This was a poignant story, really well executed. Seamless use of the prompts too. I love how the Campaign is prompting us to do things we didn't think we could do!

KSCollier said...

Great use of the prompts. You did an awesome job.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks so much, Siv. This world will definitely appear in a future novel of mine.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

I look forward to writing it in the future.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks so much. I'll admit that my brain felt wrung out after finishing my piece for this challenge.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks, Melissa.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks!

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks so much.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

See now, that just makes my day. Thanks so much, David. A compliment like that coming from who I think is one of the best writers of the new blogger friends I've made is just amazing to me. *wide grin*

Sabrina A. Fish said...

I stressed when I first looked at all those prompts, Kevin. Then I remembered that I LOVE creating new worlds and pushed the stress to the back of my mind.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

I will most definitely be writing the rest of the story in the future.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks, dear Morgan. It was hard. I am glad you liked it.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks so much, Nancy.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks. I like to make myself crazy.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

It was fun dipping my toe into a different genre.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

I agree, Gwen.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thank you. I posted about where you can get free blog designs like this on an earlier blog.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

I have a BA in Political Science. Political intrigue is a must in my stories.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks. I love these two characters already and they are still undeveloped. I definitely look forward to working on this.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

I couldn't agree more. I had to look up post-apocalyptic just to be sure I was doing it write. LOL. Loving this challenge.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks so much.

Julia King said...

I loved how you tied all of the prompts in. And the heroine ready to save the day is awesome. :D

Linda Jackson said...

Great job, Sabrina. I'm so glad I'm not a judge in this contest. The competition is fierce!!!

Honey said...

That was really, REALLY good. I can't believe how well you met all the challenges! It's inspiring- You've got my vote:)

Ashley Rachelle said...

This was pretty cool! What are the prompts? Are they the 'do these for more challenge/difficulty' things or something else I'm not seeing?

Traci Kenworth said...

Wonderful!!

Jessica Salyer said...

You did a wonderful job. The way you used the prompts blended together seamlessly. I would love to read more.

Susan Roebuck said...

That was very good. Wasn't it a meteor or asteroid that wiped out the dinosaurs? Hope, really hope, it doesn't come to that. Very well done - and using all the prompts!!!

cbwentworth said...

I love how you've created a entire world for this story to inhabit - I can imagine everything, despite so few words. Fantastic job!

I'm voting for you! :-)

Lori M. Lee said...

Hi! Wanted to let you know that your entry has been shortlisted to move onto Stage Two. Congrats!

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Yay! What is Stage Two exactly?

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks so much. I really do look forward to getting to know Sonya better.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks, Linda. I agree with you. What a fabulous set of prompts Rachael gave us.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

*blushing* Aw shucks. What an absolutely fabulous thing to say. I am so glad you liked it.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Go here for the prompts, Ash.

http://rachaelharrie.blogspot.com/2012/03/second-campaigner-challenge-of-my.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+RachaelHarrie+%28Rach+Writes...%29

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thank you.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thank you so much. I hope to write more in the near future.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

I read an article about a meteor or something that barely missed us not too long ago and couldn't help but start to imagine scenarios for a book.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks so much.

Melodie Wright said...

Hi Sabrina: great use of prompts in your premise. You've been moved into the semi-final round of judging. Congrats!

kelworthfiles said...

That was an intriguing pitch, and a great flash! Thanks for sharing.

Jocelyn Rish said...

Great use of the prompts! I especially liked how the broken bridge they were leaning against was the same bridge the red-coated child is playing on in the picture prompt - clever!

Jodi Su said...

Congratulations! You have moved to the finals!

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Wow! Thank you so much!

Cortney Pearson said...

Congrats on making it to the finals! It really was great! :)

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks, Cortney. I am excited. My very first writing accomplishment! How fun!

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks so much, Jocelyn.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thank you so much! I am so honored.

Sabrina A. Fish said...

Thanks for visiting and reading it. I am glad you liked my efforts.

Rachael Harrie said...

Congratulations on your entry Sabrina - I've awarded you fourteenth place in the Judging Round! Well done for making it so far, and make sure you check out my post to see the cool prize you've won :)

Congrats again!

Hugs,

Rach